Just live

Does anything last forever? How long can you avoid the time of saying a goodbye to the world you have lived in to. The world you have known and believed in to. To all the great things which you took for granted because they were never going to go anywhere, and those people, whom you just ignored, anyway, they were not going to abandon you or anything.

But they do.! Almost every time.

It always feels like there is just one person in this world to love. And he leaves.

And boy does it hurt to look back to those experiences and memories!

And remember all those times, when you almost gave up because you thought that you just couldn’t make it? But hey! See, you did it. You made it through.

And the time, when you were so desperate, that you sold your soul to everything you did not believe into and against every opinion you had about yourself? Today, my friend, you are a better person than that. Or should I say, because of that.

Everyone who we meet have a purpose to serve in our life. I can’t think of any one reason why I want to live with the unexpected turn of events, in my life right now, but I want to. And it just seems crazy. Maybe because I believe that every storm will bring a hope of uprooting more temporariness and cleaning the sight of what is there to stay. The scars of betrayal or the memories of kiss.

What satisfies you? A+ grades. A high end job. A huge group of cool friends. A sophisticated family. A perfect lover. What else? And if you have everything, you think that you are any different. Well let me tell you, nothing separates you from a huge group of people, who all have these things. Nobody gives a shit about another alpha. There are many.

While growing up, we thought that these things are important. First world issues.

We looked for different things in different people. Honesty. Loyalty. We looked for someone who will stand by us. Who will be right there, when the night is dark and full of terrors (Pun intended). In that dark night, you wonder of those times when you fell down and he got angry because you weren’t careful enough to step on the right stone. Times when you were scared to reach on the top first, so he raced against the time to be there when you reach. Times when you couldn’t gather the courage to face the world, so he cooked you breakfast and watched TV with you all day. You seek acceptance. For the rest, you just learn to live between hurt and healing.

Life gives you everything which you seek fiercely, but before that it makes you miserable. You try and you fall flat. You lose hope and then a tad bit of motivation and a little chunk of luck works out. Towards the end of journey, let there be no pretexts, and no qualms. Be devoured of your desires in a way that there is no acceptance of an otherwise.

I remember the first time I watched an episode of Game of Thrones. Oh god what was that. I almost gave up. Then after watching some 4 seasons, I saw the first episode again and it just made complete sense. And how in the beginning of friendship, I doubt my friends a lot of time? And then after living for a couple of days with them, we literally directs each other’s lives, thoughtfully yet vehemently. We don’t have to try to find the sense in everything just today. We can sit back and wait for the mysteries to unfold.

I have done enough things which seemed stupid to others. I am still doing them. I doubt my actions, why won’t others do it. But in my defense, I need someone who can vouch for me. I know there’s a possibility that I might be letting it go too soon, I want to steer clear of any regret what-so-ever. This insecurity is kept well obscured, within sturdy walls, behind closed curtains. Why judge people to be merely good or purely evil? Maybe it’s hard to comprehend that benevolence and spite can coexist as two aspects of an individual. And that fate may surprise me. After all, autumn comes to each one of us every year, but so does spring. How many of us care to stop and smell the flowers.

Be a happy person. Happy in a lazy way. Or in a disciplined way. Whatever suits you. Adulting can be fucking tough to take. Let’s try to align it with our lifestyle. Our generation has been the victim of this inevitable race, where everyone is running to save their ass from this social pretense, eventually becoming the society to others.

They tell you that they are going to pay you shit loads of money. Well they will, but just the right amount to keep you settled in the job. Much less than what you are worth. But yeah, if you can afford to follow your passion, do that. If you think you can’t, well than keep working and take short breaks of earned happiness. There is no right or wrong way of living to the fullest. Nobody knows how to do it right. There is no set clock that certain experiences need to be ticked off the bucket list by a certain age. Let’s not kill tomorrow with our aspirations and expectations even before we reach there. Keep your inner fire brighter than the Sun which reflects on you. That will suffice.

Let’s chase the life with a jar of Margarita. Let the blender be at Ross’. Let’s borrow the ice and tequila from Jo-Chan Chan Man. Let’s get some margarita-mix and shake-shake-shake. Drink it straight from the jar. Who cares? Not so ladylike? Well, me not so ladylike either. 😉




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